


What's In A Name

by Yudonomi



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Animals, Family Bonding, Fluff, Gen, Griddy’s Doughnuts (Umbrella Academy), Pre-Canon, everyone being lighthearted and a tinge of dumb and chaotic, so five's there and ben is still alive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:21:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26300329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yudonomi/pseuds/Yudonomi
Summary: Ben is hiding something. His siblings find out, and chaos ensues.
Relationships: Ben Hargreeves & Everyone, The Hargreeves Family
Kudos: 52





	What's In A Name

When Ben crept back inside the academy, he opened his room and nearly jumped when he saw Five sitting on his bed. Five’s expression was mostly neutral, but Ben felt like he was being watched by a camera. He stepped backwards, his heel hitting the door. If Five noticed, he didn't comment.

“Why are you in my room?” asked Ben. 

“Why aren’t you in it?”

Ben fiddled with the sleeve of his hoodie and shrugged. “I’m going to bed.”

He moved towards his bed, but Five crossed his arms and swung his legs onto the mattress so that he was taking up half of the space. He now looked suspicious, like that time last week when he wasn’t sure whether it was Diego or Klaus who had taken the last cookie from the jar (it was Vanya. She and Ben then split it and escaped before Mom or any of their brothers noticed).

"It's not Griddy's night," Five said, looking Ben straight in the eye, "and last time we went out, you told me to go ahead and returned late. Are you going to say what's up or are you just waiting to get in trouble?"

"I was at the library."

"You don't even have a library card."

"I got one." Not that he knew how to do that, but Five didn’t need to know that. 

"Your arms have scratches."

Ben tugged on his sleeves. "Training."

Five raised a brow, clearly skeptical, and when he didn't move at all after that, Ben sighed and let his hands fall at his side as he lamented his inability to lie. "Please don't tell Klaus."

"I give you my word.”

-

"So was anyone gonna tell me that Benny-boy has a whole live cat or was I supposed to find out myself?"

This time, it was Griddy's night, and so Ben turned to glare at Five, who was seated at Klaus' left beside Ben. Five shrugged nonchalantly, and at his other side, Vanya shrunk under their brother's frown. Across them, Allison's widened in interest, and to her right, Luther and Diego froze in the middle of whatever argument they were having, Diego's fist still hovering just by Luther's throat. There was no point in denying.

"Five told you?"

"What? Nah," Klaus took a bite from his doughnut, cream smudging all over his face, "I found him during uh...special training. Nearly gave me a heart attack." In the corner of his eye, Ben could see Five shift a little at the mention of 'special training', while everyone ignored Diego wondering out loud if Klaus could even see animal ghosts. "How did you even get it?"

Ben scratched the back of his head. "It's not mine, just a stray that kept staying near the dumpster. I feed it sometimes."

It had been about a month ago. He had sneaked out to find and bring Klaus back home from wherever  _ he _ sneaked out when he heard a soft mew at the alleyway by the academy's fire exit, and looked down at his feet to see a small, shivering cat. Ben had briefly considered ignoring it first in favor of the urgent mission of looking for his wayward brother, but then he felt a nudge against his foot. He looked down and saw the cat rubbing its head against his shin, wrapping itself around his legs and looking up at him with the darkest, roundest eyes. 

At that moment, he decided. It had been risky sneaking back inside to steal a slice of bread from the kitchen, but the eager way the cat wolfed it down- it must have been really starving, huh- and then gave him a satisfied meow melted his heart. He kept coming back ever since. Even on nights there was no Klaus to go after.

Luther crossed his arms and muttered under his breath. "Dad won’t like that."

Of course he wouldn't. Ben knew that the moment Dad changed his training targets from wooden dummies to live rabbits.

"Are you gonna be a s-snitch, Number One?" Diego said in a low voice.

"Shut up, Two."

"You can't even answer the question."

"You know how Dad is.”

“Okay, tattletale.”

“Fuck you.”

“Fuck  _ you _ .”

The two devolved into another argument and Allison rolled her eyes and scooted her chair away from them as she drank her milkshake. The rest of them drowned them out as well. Ben gave them five minutes. Vanya turned to Ben and asked in a soft voice, "What did you call it?"

He paused and blinked, his mind going blank. "I...never really thought of anything."

Maybe it just slipped his mind. Or he was afraid of being attached to something his father would take away as soon as he inevitably found out. Either way, the thought of naming his pet (if a stray that simply came and went as it pleased could even be called that) never entered Ben's mind.

"You're terrible," snorted Klaus, throwing his head back, "before you know it, that poor kitty's gonna end up like Five over here."

Five did not verbally rise up to the bait, although he did give Klaus a dirty look. Klaus blew back a raspberry, which did make Five eye the butter knife between them with an unnerving smile. Vanya looked between him and the utensil, shaking her head, and at this point Allison slammed her hands on the table, drawing everyone's attention and making Ben flinch even though he saw it coming. She smiled as sweetly as her milkshake, and content with the resulting silence, spoke up.

"You guys are getting too loud and I do not want to get banned from a diner again, so can it." There were grumbles, but Diego and Luther lowered their hands from each other's hair. Allison beamed brighter. "Back to the topic of Ben’s cat, I do think it'd be cuter if it had a proper name, so let's have a vote!"

Klaus was the first to raise his hand. "I nominate Garfield!" 

"Let me guess, because it's orange and your brain is too uncreative to think of anything else?"

"How rude,  _ Five _ ."

"My name is perfectly decent unlike yours, Number Four."

"I think it's a nice name."

"Thank you, Vanya!"

"I was actually talking to Five."

"Faugh!"

"You're both dumb so I suggest Tiger."

Two voices shot back in unison, "Shut up, Diego!"

"What about Hobbes?"

"A philosopher, Luther? Really?"

"It's a good idea!"

"It's  _ boring _ ."

"Like your suggestion is any better, Klaus."

"Only Allison's is better than mine, and she hasn't even said anything yet."

"Actually, I was thinking about Cl-"

“Stay quiet, sis.”

“Rude!”

"It's Ben's cat, why don't we ask him for ideas?"

"You know what, Vanya's right. Speak up, Benjamin!"

"What?"

Six pairs of eyes turned to him. Ben blinked. His siblings were all staring intently, leaning forward from their seats, even mousy Vanya. He slowly swallowed the last bite of his doughnut. The air around them was tense, and Ben could almost feel a chill crawling up his back. It felt like a hostage situation, except he was the one held captive.

Klaus dramatically swept a hand to his chest. "Don't you agree with me that our brothers have absolutely no creativity at nomenclature-"

"Hey!"

"-and that I have the superior idea and your best interest at heart?"

Ben hummed, thinking about the choices. The past minute of conversation had been an absolute headache to follow, but he went through all of his siblings' suggestions and came to one conclusion:

“No. None of what you guys said can be used.”

There was another cacophony of outbursts. Klaus fell back as if he had been physically injured by the rejection, and Allison reached across the table to actually give him a physical swat on the arm; Diego and Luther tore apart each other’s idea, and Vanya’s backed away from the clash happening in the middle of the table. Ben almost had to put his hands over his ears. The other patrons were looking at them and he wanted to crawl away somewhere. Five turned to Ben from behind Klaus’ shoulder. “Why?”

"All of the names you guys gave are orange."

"Orange for orange, gravy for fries.” Klaus said, making a face at Allison before looking at Ben, “It’s supposed to match, Ben-bro.”

"The cat was grey, Klaus.”

"But I saw it! It was orange!"

Ben shook his head. "Nope. I'm sure it was grey."

There were a few seconds of silence before realization dawned on Vanya’s face. "There are two of them." 

Allison’s hand went over her mouth, while Diego looked like a kid who found an extra candy in the package. Luther exhaled. "Our house is becoming an animal shelter."

"You're all animals, so what difference does having two more really make?" quipped Five as he downed the last of his drink. Klaus hissed at him, and Five tilted his head and gestured to him.

"I wanna see them..." murmured Vanya, shifting in her chair.

Ben smiled. The revelation was a bit surprising, but the more the merrier, so the saying went, even if it did not apply to the number of Hargreeves that should be together in a room. He took the last doughnut from the plate and wrapped it in a paper napkin before hiding it in his hoodie. "Maybe they'll be there later."

"Hopefully." Allison yawned, checking her watch. "It's getting late, we should probably head back now."

There was a small chorus of agreement, and after finishing up what was left of their snacks, the siblings paid up and left the diner, making their way back to the academy. Luther went ahead with Allison, holding hands. Diego hung back and whispered a prank idea about Allison’s teddy bear in Ben's ear while Ben also kept an eye on Klaus so he wouldn't get distracted by the corner shop they would pass by later and spend the rest of the night doing God knows what. Ben looked around and saw Vanya a few feet behind, keeping her distance, while Five came last, watching over them all from behind as he talked to her about the latest formulas he'd been working on. Seven of them all lined up in matching pajamas, weaving through alleys in the middle of the night. What a sight they must be.

When they came up to the dumpster below the fire exit by their bedrooms, a small figure emerged from the shadows. Everyone but Ben froze, and he knelt as the figure approached and reached inside his jacket. The grey cat rubbed its face against his hand and wound itself around his legs before greedily snatching the doughnut from his hand and running off. In the distance, Ben could spot it walking towards another shadow, the second feline.

"How adorable," cooed Allison behind him. They watched the cats disappear into the night before climbing back the academy inside one-by-one, tracing their escape route from earlier.

Before they parted ways and went back to their own rooms, Klaus slung his arm around Ben's shoulder, leaned his face close to his ear, and whispered, "I'm still voting for Garfield and Nermal."

Ben rolled his eyes and gently shoved away his brother with a small smile. "Good night, Klaus."

Klaus winked at him before disappearing into his room. Ben shook his head and made his way to his own bedroom. Only a family named with numbers could come up with the weirdest ideas.

**Author's Note:**

> This is one of two Ben -with-a-cat oneshots that's been on my mind since last month or so. Might post the other once I stop fooling around and actually figure it out, but pretty much the only things they have in common are the Hargreeves and a cat.


End file.
